Relentless Church Pastor, John Gray Step Down

Pastor John Gray stepped down from leading Relentless Church in South Carolina just months ago. But, even though many thought Gray’s troubles were over the eviction lawsuits which he settled with Ron Carpenter, he revealed that wasn’t the real reason he stepped down.

On Sunday, in a lengthy Instagram post, Gray revealed he stepped down to work on his marriage to his wife.

“A few months ago, I sat down from leading at Relentless. My life wasn’t in order. Church isn’t first. My wife is,” Gray wrote on the post. The post was a photo of his wife on the cover of WOE (Women of Excellence) magazine. In the post, he delves into the intimate details of how he met his wife, how they met at church, and then how he needed to grow, but she still said yes and married him. “I never knew what consistent discipline, planning, leadership, manhood, or personal holiness in action from a man’s standpoint looked like. Living a shadow life, God was unwilling to let me die assuming I was whole.”

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A few months ago I sat down from leading at Relentless. My life wasn’t in order. Church isn’t first. My wife is. This is my wife. She is from God. She is a life giver. She is a kingdom builder. Her name is Aventer. I met her at church. She was worshipping God through dance. Over time, she allowed me in her life and let me dance with her. She took my ring and said yes and we began our forever journey. What my dance partner didn’t know was that I was very much unfinished. I never knew what consistent discipline, planning, leadership, manhood, or personal holiness in action from a man’s standpoint looked like. Living a shadow life, God was unwilling to let me die assuming I was whole. I failed to uphold the holy standard of God in my marriage. And I’m sorry. Although you are the only woman I’ve ever slept with, emotional unfaithfulness is just as wrong. Sin is sin. People want to minimize one sin over another, when it all can get you sent to hell. My marriage forced me to face both of me. Flesh versus spirit. It is every man’s battle. Loving God isn’t enough. Preaching Jesus isn’t enough. Face yourself. Get delivered. Or hurt the ones who actually love you the most. I started intense counseling (personal and for my marriage) in the summer. Scariest thing ever. Most necessary thing ever. I had no one to blame. My life is my responsibility. Admit your wrong. God deserves better. My wife deserves better. The pain I caused her is immeasurable. Seeing her name in blogs because of things I did broke my soul. So since I was the cause of public embarrassment, let me be JUST AS LOUD ABOUT PUBLIC HONOR. Aventer you are a miracle to me. I am sorry for the pain I have caused you. You name should have NEVER come up in any conversation in any negative way with anyone ever. I must do the work to earn your trust. I’ve lived a life I’m not proud of in so many areas, but before I die, I will be the man God intended and the husband that Your heart can rest with. I’ll be the father my kids can be proud of. I’ll be the pastor Relentless can stand behind. I’m in the process and I will stay in it. May the man I am becoming match the vision God showed you. I love you.

A post shared by John Gray (@realjohngray) on

Gray says in the post that, even though he never slept with another woman, he was still cheating on her emotionally. “I failed to uphold the holy standard of God in my marriage. And I’m sorry. Although you are the only woman I’ve ever slept with, emotional unfaithfulness is just as wrong.”

He also asserted that, though people try to categorize different sins, all sin is wrong, no matter whether it is something perceived as small or large. “Sin is sin. People want to minimize one sin over another, when it all can get you sent to hell,” he said in the post.

Gray added that he always loved God and preached Jesus, but he still needed to work on his problems and “face [himself].”

“My marriage forced me to face both of me. Flesh versus spirit. It is every man’s battle. Loving God isn’t enough. Preaching Jesus isn’t enough. Face yourself. Get delivered. Or hurt the ones who actually love you the most,’ he wrote.

Gray’s journey of deliverance led him to receive intensive counseling, which he said was the “most necessary thing ever.” It took time, but, eventually, he started making progress. However, he said it “broke” his soul when he saw his wife’s name in blogs because of things he did. The public embarrassment he caused her, hurt him the most.

In the post, Gray took the time to say how amazing his wife is. “Aventer you are a miracle to me. I am sorry for the pain I have caused you. You name should have NEVER come up in any conversation in any negative way with anyone ever. I must do the work to earn your trust. I’ve lived a life I’m not proud of in so many areas, but before I die, I will be the man God intended and the husband that Your heart can rest with,” he said.

Source: Christian Headlines

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